nendil | Warning: bizarre... uh, just bizarre.

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Warning: bizarre... uh, just bizarre.

::rofl:: I actually came across an FF.net entry about Link's ::cough:: troublesome encounter with Morpha. And then afterwards, Sheikcomfort(TM). Not saying that I've not considered that scenario, but I thought Dark Link would've provided much better drama, what with having hands and being able to talk (and taunt) and having some semblance of motive and all. Horny blobby water pr0n is, well, rather squickier than even I had imagined. It... doesn't even... have... a BRAIN...

(I would say this'd have made a fine offering to

ficbitches, but nothing could ever top that Ganondorf... thing. <g>)

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Why am I so not surprised that there's a fic about that? Probably because I've run across Princess Peach/Pipe Flower porn (by accident, I swear!).

Sheikcomfort(TM)

Ha!

Bwahaha, I'd have to say THAT's one I've never considered. But um... those things have TEETH?

The Sheik part actually didn't go nearly as far as I'd expected, thus making the fic even more squickier by denying us proper yaoi. XP

Ugh, what is this, 'Squick Dolphincheddar Day'? I thought that what I came up with while thinking too much about a video game cut scene was squicky, then a friend of mine came up with something worse, and now have this stuff you two have found. I haven't even read the things and I am madly squicked.

Squick is a funny word. Like conniption. [/nonsensical topic derail]

Anyway...Never mind, I think I'd rather stay off of this topic. If you'll excuse me, I'll be making fun of Link's mad ninja skillz, which are completely devoid of squickyness.

-dolphincheddar, the thoroughly squicked telephonist

PS: I think already tried to post this. If it's a double post, sorry. In my experience all computers are evil (like the chicken dance!) and intent on annoying me.

Well, we know what you've been up to... ^_~ (My brother and I quote lines from the Chocolate! scene at any and all opportunity. He knows the words better than I do, which is sad because he's nine.)

At any rate, don't think too hard about it dear. The net is chock-full of things that'll squick out the most squick-immune... um... non-squick-ers. And send them into a conniption. Trust me, this is nothing.

I would quote things from the chocolate scene, but I can't hear quite as well as I'd like. I can hear, of course, but I think being near tubas and cymbals last year might have affected it a bit. I'm sure if my little brother (also nine, hears better than me) watched it as much as he'd like (I don't let him, because he's annoying), he'd be quoting it like Strong Bad. Ah, poor Strong Bad.

Telling me not to think too much is like telling me not to breathe. I have to do it, especially when I'm bored. Thinking too much makes for some pretty weird stuff. I do hope no one plays that game and thinks of what I thought and decides to write it. (twitch, twitch at the thought)

-dolphincheddar, the telephonist who gets hit by doorframes a lot

Well, remember, FFN has that ban on NC-17 fics (oh, the bitterness), so things can't go all that far (and again with the bitterness).

To be perfectly honest, I gave up on LoZ slash fic long ago. The horrific ways in which all of the authors I ran across treated the female characters made me want to kill myself. After I killed them. I'm sure there's good LoZ slash out there; I've just decided not to annoy myself by wading through the bad stuff to find it. I have, however, been lucky enough to find the hothot slash *fanart* or two. Yowza!

...this talk of slash has me craving some Angel/Spike action. 'Scuse me.

The Morpha part was ::hackcough:: detailed enough.

(WHY, WHY did the Giant Aquatic Amoeba have... it... where... ::looks over at Dolphincheddar's traumatized mind:: nevermind.)

Yeah, my poor traumatized mind. It's weird, too. You never know what it'll think of next. It's thought of some pretty weird stuff, too (especially when I'm asleep...weird). I deny having much to do with it.

And people do post things that should be NC-17 under the R category. I stay away from R, PG-13 is as high as I'll go. Besides, that's where the best stuff is, usually. Example: Nendil herself.

[off topic] *is envious of superior writing ability* [/off topic]

And...uh...I don't think I'd like to know much about this version of the giant aquatic amoeba. If you tell me, my very own Attack Mary Sue (occasionally handy to have around) will beat your with her Mary Sue Quarterstaff of Perfect Doom. And then a nicer, less perfect character will kill her again.

-dolphincheddar, the telephonist who prefers her fantastic world of elves, swords, and flying cats to the real one with it's Internet

Won't you be pleased to find out where my PG-13 writing is going.

...

::goes away now::

It is bad form to interrupt one's jaunt through a fantastic world full of elves, swords, and flying cats with ominous-sounding sentences. (insert 'twitch' here)

And if I'm interpreting that correctly, you can't corrupt me because (a)the first chapter is fine all on it's own and (b)Jason movies, people at school, and television already have corrupted me. You lost your chance. (another 'twitch' for good measure)

Ew...the last Jason movie I watched...supremely nasty. Of course, I don't faint at the sight of blood, but it was still gross. The worst part was the guy eating the heart. That was screwy.

...and so ends the gory movies tangent. Now back to my fantastic world full of elves, swords, and flying cats. And swivel office chairs because they're so dang COOL. *spins*

-dolphincheddar, the dizzy telephonist

And people do post things that should be NC-17 under the R category.

And then there are those of us who don't post hard-core pr0n, per se, but do push the R rating just a wee bit. *whistles innocently*

Actually, if you use American movies as a guide as to what should be rated what, you have to get pretty explicit before a sex scene bumps a story into the NC-17 category. Then again, I don't think I've ever heard of a film being rated NC-17 simply for violence. Guess it goes to show which is more acceptable in American society. ;-)

We are a violent people, after all. Violence isn't all that great, but who wants to talk things out when you can put holes in them quicker, right?

That is, if you have a firearm. I don't have one. Yet. (insert maniacal laughter here)

I wonder how violent a movie would have to be to get NC-17? Certainly worse than someone's head getting blown off in a fight, right? That movie was fun, Mark rewound the tape at least twice so we could watch that scene over again. I wanted to pummel him, cause that delayed the end of the movie.

I and my violent self will be watching fun gory war movies now.

-dolphincheddar, the happily violent telephonist

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Warning: bizarre... uh, just bizarre.

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